


I'm Not Your Best Friend

by niallmightyygirl



Category: One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, a little bit of Zouis also
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-18 09:45:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8157770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/niallmightyygirl/pseuds/niallmightyygirl
Summary: "Niall... Niall what are you doing here?" Harry asks, holding the covers up to his bare chest."Yeah mate, shut the door would ya?" Louis adds.Niall flicks his wet eyes back to Harry."I just came by to...t let you know I'm going back to Mullingar.""What?" Harry stands then, naked to the world. "Why?""Harry I... I cant keep this in anymore and the only way to get rid of it is by leaving.""Niall I dont understand. Whats going on? What can I do to help?""Nothing. Not anymore."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "Yes, i know this is a bar but you’re a rlly hot bartender and i panicked and said “cHOCOLATE MILK” when you asked me what i wanted to drink, now i just want to crawl away and hide forever”  
> Not really based on this prompt exactly but I've had this idea in my head a while and I just needed to add more. I saw this and it all came together.  
> If there are errors, forgive me because I was too lazy to check them.

_**I'm Not Your Best Friend** _  
_**Narry** _

 

This was Niall's night. It was _his_ night. He had everything set up and he's so ready for Harry to come home and see it all. He has no doubt in his mind that Harry's going to be blown away. Harry always says that he's always wanted to be swept off his feet but his ex-boyfriends were all apparently too manly to do something girly, old-fashioned or cliche like that.  
  
Niall has Harry's living room set up like a mini five star restaurant. He got a small round table with a deep red cover on it, set in the middle are (fake) white roses in a clear vase, above the entry way and around the whole living room are twinkling white lights, he's taken some of Harry's cinnamon scented candles and placed them about the area lit, he's pushed the couch to the far wall to the left so as it is out of the way and he's got some stellar covers from YouTube artists covering some of Harry's favorite Beatles tunes.  
  
This is it.  
  
This is the night Niall will finally tell Harry how he feels. Harry has been recently dumped (and cruelly) by his ex-boyfriend Xander.  
  
Niall couldnt believe his ears when Harry told him that he and Xander decided to move in together. They had only been dating for two weeks! They didnt even know much about each other! Before they were dating, they had only known each other for five days, maybe a week even. It wasnt out of jealousy that Niall told Harry that Xander was just using him. Who moves in with someone after only two weeks of knowing them? Who agrees to be someone's boyfriend after not even knowing each other a week? No. Niall wasnt jealous. He was worried. He was worried Harry was going to get hurt.  
  
Niall felt terrible for thinking Xander was going to hurt Harry when Harry told Niall that Xander and his family were taking a trip here in London from America and they had gotten into a fight and Xander stormed off and when he came back to the hotel, everything and everyone was gone. They had even taken Xander's things. They had even taken his passport. He couldnt go back home if he wanted to. What kind of parent does that to their child? Well, Xander was 31 at the time so... But still. He was their flesh and blood.  
Fortunately Xander had his wallet with money and his ID on him. He didnt have much but he was able to take care of himself for a while. It wasnt enough Niall guesses because Harry decided to move him in.  
  
After about a year and three months of dating, Xander had told Harry he was going home to America. He had saved up enough money and was leaving first thing Tuesday morning. He had asked Harry is he wanted to come with him.  
  
And Harry fucking considered it!  
  
He had come to Niall to talk about it. Although Niall doesnt know why when Harry wouldnt even let him get a word in. Harry decided that he would. He had already called his mom, sister, dad and Robin and told them he'd be going to America with Xander and he'd be back as soon as he could.  
  
The next day his family threw a going away party for him. Niall didnt want to go because it was too painful to think of Harry leaving but he went anyway. Because he's a good friend. Because he'll always support Harry. Because he loves him.  
  
When Harry returned home that evening, he found Xander and his things long gone. Xander had left a note to Harry saying things were moving too fast and that he was sorry.  
That was eight months ago. It took Harry a while to get over it but he's okay now.  
  
When Niall was certain Harry was better, he decided that now would be a good time to tell Harry his feelings. He couldnt bear the thought of Harry getting back out there and finding another American that would take advantage of his kindness and then take him away. He didnt want to go through that again so he gathered his courage and was ready. As soon as Harry walked through that door, Niall was going to confess his love.  
  
Niall had been in love with Harry since they were eighteen.  
  
They met when they were sixteen but Niall didnt realize it was love until eighteen. Niall is 23 now and Harry is 22. He's had to sit back and watch Harry fall in and out of "love" for the last five years. Of course he'd wanted to tell Harry sooner but he didnt have the guts. It took Harry almost leaving for him to get his wits about.  
Now he was ready.

 

Niall heard keys jingling outside the door forty-five minutes later. His heart-rate sped up. This is it. This is _it_.  
  
The door opened and Harry's eyes were on the floor as he stepped in. He shrugged off his coat and as he looked up to hang it on the coat-rack next to the door, he noticed Niall and the state of his living room.  
  
"Niall what.... what's all this?" Harry asked with a gob-smacked expression on his face.  
  
Harry dropped his coat on the floor and stepped forward. Niall smiled and stepped forward as well.  
  
"Harry," Niall started. He held out a (real) red rose to Harry. "Harry I know you've been upset lately so I.... I threw together a little something for you."  
"A little something? Niall this is.... This is more than a little something. This is.... Ni, this is amazing. Its so beautiful. I cant believe you did this. Its.... Wow." Harry's eyes were wide as was his smile.  
Niall's cheeks tinted pink. "Thanks." Niall watched Harry walk around the room. "I would have done it outside but its cold and raining."  
Harry scoffed. "Typical London weather, huh? But I like it Niall. I love it actually. Thank you."  
"Dont thank me yet." Niall walked over and pulled out a chair. "Come sit down."  
  
Harry smiled and sat in the chair Niall had open. Niall picked up the white wine and poured himself and Harry a glass.  
  
"Thank you." Harry said.  
Niall nodded and took a sip. "So, how was your day?"  
"It was great actually. They finally let me audit a case live. I learned a little bit more today. I even pointed out something of great importance to the lawyer on the case. He still didnt win but he said that judge has a stick up his arse anyway. My instructor thinks that I might have a good chance of becoming a lawyer."  
"Thats amazing Haz! I'm so proud of you!"  
"Thanks Niall."  
"What about the client? He didnt get in too much more trouble did he?"  
"She and no. It was just a few unpaid parking tickets. He was going to send her to jail until I pointed out something. Instead she just got fined about 700 pounds and has to pay for the damage on the man who cut her offs car. Its not too much money though. I think she'll be okay."  
"You kept someone from going to jail unfairly though Harry," Niall said, reaching across the table and putting his hand atop Harry's. "and thats all that matters right?"  
"Yeah." Harry looked down at their hands.  
  
Niall didnt know if he imagined it or not, Harry blushing.  
  
"Are you hungry?" Niall said standing.  
"Very."  
"I made Puttanesca. This is like, my second time ever making it so.... I hope it isnt too bad and that you like it."  
"I'm sure I will Niall."  
  
Niall turned to hide the tomato red his face surely was and went into the kitchen.

  
Half an hour, great food, wine and conversation later, Harry set his fork down. After the pasta, Niall brought out dessert which was a grocery market chocolate cake. Harry was the baker and Niall wasnt even going to dare try.  
  
"Why did you do all this Niall?" Harry asked suddenly.  
  
The fork stopped, cake on Niall's tongue.  
  
"Like, you could have just brought over a couple of beers and watched The Notebook. Thats what we usually do when I'm upset."  
  
Niall set the fork down and dabbed at his mouth with the napkin.  
  
"I know Harry but.... Tonight....tonight I had t do it like this."  
"Why? People dont usually do things like this unless they love someone or they're - " Harry gasped. "Oh my God Niall, what did you do!?"  
"What?" Niall was gobsmacked this time. "What are you talking about?"  
"Did you beat up a homeless person? Steal something from a store?"  
"What?" Niall laughed. "What? Why would you even think that?"  
Harry shrugged. "I'm a lawyer so you must think I'll get you off easy."  
  
Niall shifted in his seat at that.  
  
"I didnt do any of that Harry. You dont have to worry."  
  
Harry's eyes clouded over and he looked down.  
  
"This is because of Xander isnt it?"  
"What?"  
Xander is the last thing Niall wants to talk or hear about.  
"Last week when I met that American.... I know you saw that I was thinking of him." Harry looked up then. "I'm okay Niall. I told you that I am. I'm over it and I'm over him. You didnt have to do this. I've moved on."  
"No Harry its.... Its not that." Niall took a deep breath. "I have to tell you something Harry and-"  
"In fact, I've already met someone." Harry interrupted.  
"W-what?" Niall sputtered.  
"The lawyer I helped today invited me out for drinks and...." Harry blushed massively.  
  
He hasnt even said much but Niall's heart is already breaking in two. No. This was supposed to be his night. This was the night he was supposed to divulge onto Harry his five year secret. This cant be happening. It **cant** be.  
  
"I went to the bar to get us our drinks and thats when I saw him."  
"S-s-saw w-who?"  
  
Harry's eyes glazed over and his smile grew. He looked so spacey as if his mind had wandered somewhere else.  
  
"The bartender. He was bending over and.... He caught me ogling his arse and.... Niall his eyes are like.... They're blue, like yours, but more like.... intense in a way. Hypnotic. Mesmerizing. I couldnt even.... I lost myself in them. He laughed when he saw how flushed I was."  
"Harry-"  
"He asked me what I wanted to drink and I said chocolate milk." Harry put his face in his hands. "I said fucking chocolate milk Niall! Who does that!? Who goes to a bar and orders chocolate milk!? For fuck sake I embarrassed myself!"  
  
Niall reached over to caress Harry's hand then thought better of it. He sat back and although he was broken, he listened anyway. Because he's a good friend. Because he'll always support Harry. Because he loves him.  
  
"I ran from the bar and went back to my table. I couldnt believe I did that. When the lawyers realized I didnt have the drinks one of them went to get them. A few minutes later, a waiter came by to give us the drinks and mine was.... Mine was a fuckin chocolate milk!" Harry laughed then. He shook his head. "'Compliments of the bartender' I looked over and he smiled and winked at me." Harry blushed. "I talked myself into going up to the bar and Niall.... It might have been the best thing I've ever done. I talked to the bartender for a while and he's so great Niall. Like he's just.... I cant believe how fast he made my heart beat. It was like I'd known him forever. We only talked for about three hours but I still feel like something sparked between us."  
  
Niall looked away for a moment. This _cant_ be happening.  
  
"I asked him for his number too." Niall turned back. "And he gave it to me. I dont know if I'll call him though. I mean.... If I embarrassed myself just by looking at his face then imagine what I'll do at the sound of only his voice in my ear. His voice! Oh my god Niall his voice! He -"  
"Whats his name?" Niall asked.  
"Louis. Louis Tomlinson."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the back and forth with Liam. I just couldnt stop thinking about him. *loving sigh* *hearteyes*

Its been about three weeks and all Niall has been hearing is LouisLouisLouis. Louis did this, Louis did that. Louis used to do this, Louis used to do that. Louis can do this, Louis can do that. Niall is sick of it. Well, not so much sick as heartbroken. But he continues to listen to Harry. Because he's a good friend. Because he'll always support Harry. Because he loves him.

  
Niall walked up to the off-white apartment door of his best friend. Not Harry. No. He cant look at Harry right now. Doesnt want to think about him. Thats why he's here. At Liam's. Liam whom he'd met at Uni. A lot of mean words were exchanged but they're the best of friends now. Liam has always been the one to make Niall happy (other than Harry of course). When Niall was feeling down about anything, Liam was there. Since Harry cant be the one to make Niall happy, he needs to see Liam. He needs to smile again. He needs someone to calm the hurt in his heart.  
  
As he got close to the door, he could hear voices.  
  
"WELL WHO GETS THEIR BOYFRIEND A TIE FOR THEIR ANNIVERSARY!? AT LEAST I PUT THOUGHT INTO MINE! NOT ONLY THAT BUT HEART!"  
"WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT LIAM!? DONT TRY AND CHANGE THE SUBJECT!"  
"WE'RE ON THIS SUBJECT BECAUSE OF THE ANNIVERSARY GIFTS JAYD!"  
"I CANT FUCKIN BELIEVE--"  
  
Niall knocked hard on the door. If he hadnt they probably wouldnt have heard him.  
  
"OH NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE! I TOLD YOU TO STOP YELLING! THATS PROBABLY THE LANDLORD RIGHT NOW!"  
"ME!? YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STARTED YELLING IN THE FIRST PLACE!"  
"I STARTED YELLING BECAUSE YOU CURSED AT ME!"  
"OHMYGOD ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW!?"  
  
Niall knocked again. He heard Jayd groan.  
  
"NO! JAYD NO! I'LL GET IT!"  
  
The door opened a few seconds later to a red-faced Liam. Niall looked past him into the apartment and saw no signs of Jayd. Oh. Jayd is Liam's girlfriend. Has been for two and a half years. She's great. She and Niall hit it off really well.  
  
"T-trouble in paradise?" Niall joke.  
  
He tried anyway. He probably shouldnt have. He's got his own trouble in paradise... He shook his head to rid Harry from his thoughts.  
  
Liam huffed. "She's being unreasonable. As usual..."  
  
Liam stepped to the side and Niall walked in. There were rose petals littering the floor, a single candle on the coffee table, now unlit and he looked into the kitchen and saw what was probably a decent tasting meal covering the floor along with a broken glass plate.  
  
Niall gulped. Why oh why did he have to come here at a time like this? He came over to NOT think about Harry. The way his eyes sparkled when he walked in and saw his living room set alit, the big grin that spread over his face when Niall handed him the rose, the pink that tinted his cheeks when Niall placed his hand atop his, the laugh he made when Niall told him a joke about a kitten, the many laughs Harry told him he'd shared with Louis Tomlinson....  
  
Niall shook his head. He needs to get Harry off his mind right now. He looked around again. Wait, didnt he hear Liam yelling something about an anni- Oh! Its Liam's anniversary!  
  
"Happy anniversary mate." Niall said, forcing a smile.  
Liam sighed. "Not really."  
"Why's that?"  
"Jayd! She's fuckin upset because I bought her a necklace!"  
Niall snickered. "What?"  
"Its our anniversary! Was I supposed to get her nothing!?"  
"Why is she mad you bought her a necklace?" Niall sat on the sofa.  
"Because she's fuckin crazy thats why!" Liam yelled, throwing his hands up. "Got it engraved with my and her initials and she told me to take it back! Who the fuck does that!? I thought girls liked that sort of thing!"  
"Guess not." Niall mumbled.  
  
Harry would have liked that. Would have loved it actually. Niall could see it. Him buying Harry a necklace with his initials on it. Harry repaying him with kisses. On the lips preferably. Or on his chest where his heart is.  
  
_'He's got tattoos on his arms and they're amazing Niall. There's one of a stickman on a skateboard. Its just so adorable. Oh! He's also got one on his chest but he wouldnt let me see it. He said that I'd get to see it one day and then winked at me. He winked at me Niall!'_  
  
Definitely on his heart to keep from aching. Fucking Louis Tomlinson.  
  
"Can you believe that?!" Liam was saying. Well screaming.  
Niall didnt hear a word but he shook his head anyway.  
"All because it cost a tiny bit more than our budget! Not even by a lot! Its not about the money anyway. I wanted to get her something that shows that I love her but no! She got all Mr. Krabs on me and went ballistic!"  
  
Niall chuckled at that comparison. He definitely cant compare Harry to Mr. Krabs. Mr. Krabs would despise Harry. Harry throws his money about like its confetti. Niall once watched him purchase two-thousand dollar Chelsea boots. They looked good on him. Anything looks great on Harry.  
  
"I mean, its not like it matters anyway. I cant take it back because she lost it. Took it off her neck and threw it across the room. Not to mention its got our names on them so it would be hard to find someone to buy a necklace with the names 'Jayd and Liam' on it."  
  
Niall hums. He'd never get rid of anything Harry would/has given him. He's still got the personalized mug Harry had given him on his birthday one time. Harry had burst into the bathroom while Niall was in there and took a picture of him. He had it put on a mug but the picture only shows up if you put a hot liquid in it. He found out when he had poured his Da some tea when he had come to visit. There was a 16 year old Niall with his pants around his legs, eyes wide as if he'd been caught masturbating, sat bare-assed on the toilet. Niall could only laugh and laugh.  
  
Niall giggles at the memory. He wasnt in love with Harry then but they definitely had something special. Even his dad agreed.  
  
"I was just trying to do something nice Jayd!" Liam yelled, snapping Niall out of his trance.  
  
Niall heard a bedroom door open. Fuck. Here we go.  
  
"It would have been nice if you didnt spend all our rent money on that stupid necklace! We're not gonna have a place to live Liam! Rent is due next week!"  
"It wasnt even that much! We're gonna be fine!"  
"Wasnt that - Liam the necklace was 200 pounds! How is that not that much!?"  
"The rent is more than that!"  
"The rent is 50 pounds more! You basically spent all our money on it! And you didnt even ask me!"  
"Oh so now I have to ask your permission to buy you nice things!?"  
"When you're spending up all our rent money, yes!"  
"Its my money too Jayd! I can spend it if I want too!"  
"Liam," Jayd shakes her head and chuckles. "You're not fucking get it. I-"  
"No I dont. Explain it to me. Explain to me why getting you a gift is such a bad thing? Explain to me why I cant love you? Explain to me why I want to marry you."  
  
_'Explain to me why I cant love you.'_  
  
Louis. Louis Tomlinson is the reason Niall cant love Harry. Niall tries to keep his face neutral and his eyes dry but...he must not have done a good job because the next thing he knows, Jayd and Liam have both their arms wrapped around him, shushing him, stroking his hair and telling him it will be okay.  
  
Niall doesnt think it will be. Not as long as Louis is in the picture.  
  
Its not like Harry has stopped talking to him. He calls Niall almost everyday. Louis doesnt start off as the main topic but he somehow ends up being brought up. Niall doesnt even think they're boyfriends yet. Harry told him they're taking things slow because Louis just broke up with someone too.  
  
Harry has even told Louis about Xander. Harry was so broken up about that. Not four weeks ago, he went silent for about a day and a half after bumping into that American guy. Clearly meeting that American brought up unresolved feelings. Apparently Harry is over that now.  
  
Niall is the one that was there for Harry day in and day out. Niall is the one that helped Harry back on his feet. Who does Louis Tomlinson think he is to take credit for that?  
  
But Niall will still stay by Harry's side. Will continue to support him. Because he's a good friend. Because he loves him.  
  
When Niall is all cried out, Jayd brings him a cup of tea. He sips at it silently. He can feel their eyes on him. Can hear their silent questions asking whats wrong. Niall just shakes his head. Jayd kisses the top of Niall's head. He smiles.  
  
"Sorry about that." He says.  
"Its okay sweetie." She runs her hand through his fake blond locks. "Whatever has got you down, Liam and I are here to help okay? Whenever you feel like you're ready to talk about it, we're here and we're always gonna be."  
"Thanks." Niall says. "I'll remember that."  
Jayd kisses his head again. She then stands.  
"Liam, can I talk to you in the bedroom for a minute?"  
  
Liam nods and they both leave Niall alone.  
  
Niall sighs heavily and leans back into the couch. He hadnt known he'd dozed off until he heard his phone ringing. He picks it up and first looks at the time. 11:47pm. He'd arrived at Liam's around seven thirty-ish.  
  
**Harry**  
  
Niall sits up abruptly. He wipes at his face for drool as if Harry will be able to see. Even if he did, Niall knows he wouldnt judge him. Thats one of the things Niall loves about him. He sees the good in everything. He always wants to help even if the situation is dire.  
  
Niall takes a deep breath.  
  
"Hello?" He answers.  
"NIALL! WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN!?"  
"I'm, I'm at - Why? Whats going on? Are you alright?" Niall starts to panic a bit.  
"No I'm not alright! I need you bloody here!"  
"Whats going on?" Niall asks, although he's already standing up. "Where are you?"  
"I'm at my house. Please Niall, you have to hurry. I need you."  
  
_'Please Niall. I need you.'_  
  
Fuck.  
  
"Okay. Okay stay right there. I'm on my way. I'll be there as soon as I can."  
"Thanks Ni. You're the bestest."  
"I lo-... I'll see you in a bit."

Niall arrives to Harry's house and without knocking, lets himself in. Harry had given Niall a key a long time ago.  
  
_'Because I want you in my life Niall. In. Out. It doesnt matter. As long as you have this key, I know you'll always come back.'_  
  
_Harry had given him a speech as if were something more serious than giving your best friend a key to your house. Niall teared up anyway. He pulled Harry into a hug._  
  
_'I'll never leave you Harry. Never. You're my best friend and I... I care about you a lot.'_  
_Harry chuckles. 'Jesus Niall. Its just a key. Dont get so sentimental about it.'_  
  
_Niall just laughs along._  
  
_The way Harry looked at him that day... Niall had thought Harry felt it too. His heart raced into his throat and he couldnt speak._  
  
_'Wanna test it out?'_  
_W-what? What? T-test what out?"_  
_'The key.' Harry laughed. 'I'm starving. Been craving Chinese since my co-worker gave me one of her eggrolls. Come on.'_

*** * * * * ***

But thats not the way Niall got in. The door was unlocked and he waltzed right in.  
  
"Harry?" Niall called out. "Harry what have I told you about locking this - Jaysus! What the hell happened in here!?"  
  
Harry was on his bed half-naked, only in tight black briefs. His head was in his hands. He snapped up when he heard Niall's voice.  
  
"Niall! You're here!" Harry jumped up and wrapped his arms around Niall's neck. "What took you so long?!"  
"I... I was at Liam's." Niall put some distance between him and a naked Harry. He tried not to look down. "He lives like... 45 minutes away from here. What uh... Why did you call me? Whats wrong?"  
  
"I... Niall I _need_ you!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is quite fast isnt it? I hope I'm making it to where you can understand and follow. I'm not so good at writing long stories. Again, forgive my mistakes.
> 
> PS. No Liam Payne's were harmed in the making of this story. I promise. His gf just knocked the plate over bcuz she was angry.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this makes up for last week. I've been busy working AND I've had writer's block. I only had one sentence written, lol. Anyway, enjoy.  
> Niall's a bit of a dick in the beginning but remember, he's just jealous.

"Hey. You must be Neil right?" A small brunette said, smiling and holding his hand out to Niall. "Harry has told me so much about you."  
_'Not enough for you to get my name right.'_ Niall thinks.  
Niall smiles and takes his hand. "Yeah. Nice to meet you. Harry...he talks a lot about you too."  
_'A lot. Bordering on obsession.'_  
The brunette laughs. "Thats our Harry huh? A real chatterbox this one."  
"Yeah. Thats our Harry..." Niall mumbles, looking over at Harry.  
"Shut up Louis." Harry says. "I do not talk a lot."  
"Not only do you talk a lot, it takes you _forever_ to form a complete sentence. Seriously Harry. Which one of your parents taught you to speak?"  
  
Harry was smiling. And looking at Louis. Of fucking course he was. He looks like a real life hearteyes emoji. Niall feels like he's going to be sick.  
  
"We should probably head inside." Louis says. "Zayn probably wont be here for awhile. The lazy twat."  
  
Louis had a groupon he got at work for "dealing with the rudest customer ever". Thats what Harry told him anyway. He works at a bar. The customers are gonna be rude no matter what. Louis probably just didnt want to take Harry to a nicer place. He probably couldnt even afford it. Look at him. The Vans he has on look worn out and he's wearing a black tank top with a skull on it and black skinny jeans, his hair looks a mess on top of his head, doesnt even look washed and his facial hair, almost looks like it could cut something open. Niall thinks this because Harry went into kiss him when they showed up and Harry said ouch and told Louis he should shave his beard and then Louis told him he can kindly fuck off. Thats when Niall decided he didnt like Louis. Who talks to their boyfriend like that? (Oh yeah. They're boyfriends now apparently. _"I thought we were already boyfriends Harry."_ Thats what Louis told him when Harry asked him if he wanted to be his boyfriend.) And one they just started dating at that? This was supposed to be the puppy love phase. Nothing but sweet nicknames, playful touching, flirty eyes, blushing cheeks and first impressions.  
  
Harry is in that phase still. He called Niall the other day because he was so distraught over what to wear. Louis told Harry he wanted to take him out and wear something nice because he was going to be meeting someone special in Louis' life. Harry had no idea who it was. He thought he was going to be meeting his mom or dad or grandma or grandpa or a beloved relative. Niall listened to him ramble on aimlessly and then helped pick out an outfit for his date like the supportive friend he is.  
  
Niall was blindsided when Harry told him Louis wanted him to bring Niall too. He didnt want to meet Louis. He didnt want to be around the guy that stole Harry's heart from him. Well, technically he didnt steal it because Niall never had it but you get it.  
  
Niall wore a dark blue button up and skinny jeans that he rolled up above his ankles and white sneakers. He didnt want to come but just in case it was someone important to Louis, automatically that person would be important to Harry so Niall decided to dress semi casual. Harry on the other hand...  
  
He tried to wear a suit. Niall managed to talk him out of it. When Harry brought out the suit, all Niall could picture was Harry and Louis at an alter and no. He shook his head and got Harry to dress more sensibly. Well, as sensible as Harry Styles could get. The first shirt he put on was see through. The second wasnt much better. Harry kept pulling out different flashy shirts and as much as Niall loved them because even he has crazy shirts too, he made Harry sit back and picked out his outfit. It was a egg-shelled colored long sleeve shirt, black skinny jeans and his infamous Chelsea boots. Harry looked amazing.  
  
But apparently their efforts in looking nice was all for naught because when Harry pulled up to the restaurant, it was some greasy burger joint. Harry was doing a little cleanse at the moment and nowhere on that menu was greasy burger. Over a span of five weeks, Louis managed to get Harry to eat actual food again. Niall thought it was silly when Harry told him about his cleanse and tried to get him to eat but Harry said no and of course Niall respected that. Excpet for the occasional pizza when he's upset, Harry wont eat anything other than health foods. Niall wonders how many times Harry told Louis no but Louis made him eat anyway.  
  
"There he is. Oi! Zayn! Over here!" Louis shouted, bringing Niall out his thoughts.  
  
Niall turned and saw a really beautiful man with the most amazing eyes he's ever seen. Aside from Harry of course. The man was beautiful, Niall can say that, but Harry is the only one for him. And for Louis apparently...  
  
Louis grinned when he saw the man look his way and started to get out of the booth only to be halted because Harry was sitting on the outside.  
  
"Move Harry." Louis said.  
  
Harry complied. Seriously? Niall raised an eyebrow at Harry but Harry of course wasnt looking at him. Still looking at Louis like a lovesick puppy. Niall has only known Louis for all of thirty minutes and disliked him already. Disliked him even more should he say. When Harry spoke of him, he spoke of him highly. Niall didnt imagine this when he was to meet Louis. What does Harry see in him? He's literally insulted Harry at least four times since they've been here.  
  
Louis brought his arms up and wrapped them around the man's neck, the man wrapping his arms around Louis waist and pulling him close. They stayed like that for about 10 seconds. Louis pulled back and then put his hands on the mans cheeks.  
  
"I'm glad you could make it." Louis said to him.  
The man nodded. "Yeah."  
  
They smiled at each other. The smiled at each other the way Niall - _Oh!_ Niall's eyes widened. He looked at Harry but of course Harry was oblivious to the interaction. Typical.  
  
"Lads, this is my best friend Zayn. Zayn, this is Harry and his friend Neil."  
  
Niall didnt even care that he didnt say his name right. What he didnt hear was Louis referring to Harry as his boyfriend. Interesting.  
  
"Hi." Zayn said, giving a little wave.  
Harry held his hand out. "Nice to meet you. Did you get here okay?"  
"Yeah. Lou and I come here all the time."  
"Really?" Harry said.  
  
Louis sat down and Harry next to him leaving Zayn to sit next to Niall.  
  
"Yeah. We come here so much they've even gotten one of Zayn's drawings up on the wall there." Louis pointed. "He drew on the back of one of the menus with a permanent marker and they were gonna make him pay for it but they liked it so they hung it up instead. Look, I even used my mum's label maker and printed his name and put it under the picture. You know, like they do at museum's."  
  
Niall didnt even know what it was supposed to be but hey. Who is he to knock someone's talent? He's still messes up playing the guitar sometimes.  
  
They ordered after that, the waitress, Eleanor, asking Zayn and Louis if they wanted their usual's. Harry ordered the same as Louis, of course he did and Niall just ordered a glass of water. He wanted a pint but they didnt serve that here. Too bad.  
  
"Are you sick Neil?" Louis asked. "Why didnt you order anything?"  
Niall shrugged. "A bit. I'll be fine."  
  
Because he was really. Sick of seeing Louis and Harry together. Sick of Louis and Harry everything.  
  
"Are you sure Niall?" Harry spoke up. "Do you need to go home? I can call you a cab."  
  
Why call him a cab? Why not take him home himself?  
  
Niall shook his head. "I'm fine Harry. Dont worry."  
"Okay. If you're sure." Harry smiled.  
  
And then Niall smiled. The butterflies in his stomach came to life for the four seconds Harry looked at him. Harry put his hand on the table and then opened his mouth to say something else but then Louis put his arm around his shoulder. Harry looked over at Louis and grinned wider. Louis leaned in and Harry did too and then they kissed. Niall's smile dropped as did the butterflies.  
  
"Something wrong Neil?" Louis' friend asked.  
"My name is Niall." Niall growled.  
Zayn held his hands up. "Sorry. Niall."  
Niall took a breath and looked down. "Sorry, sorry. Its just... I'm a little under the weather. I'm sorry."  
  
Zayn smirked. Niall sees a look in his eyes. Like he knew Niall was lying.  
  
"So uh...how long have you known Louis?"  
"Six years." Zayn smiled. "Right Lou? I think we knew that we'd be...the best of friends, when we first met."  
Louis smiled. "Yeah. You should have seen this guy when we first met. Couldnt get a word out of him. Really really shy. But thats how I like them."  
  
Louis winked at Zayn and Zayn shook his then chuckled. Harry laughed too. How can he not see this?  
  
The rest of the dinner consisted of Harry attempting to get to know Zayn only to have Louis speak for him and bring up old memories of them two. At one point Louis decided to let Harry talk for a while and it turns out Harry and Zayn have a little in common. Other than them both being infatuated with Louis...  
  
Niall cant say he was enjoying himself but he wasnt having a bad time either. When Louis and Harry would...pay attention to each other, he would talk to Zayn. They had things in common too. Niall made Zayn laugh and it was a nice laugh. It made Niall laugh too. They started talking about superheroes and if it werent for Liam and Jayd being into those things, he wouldnt have any idea what Zayn was talking about. Then music. Niall was more into indie rock and pop music but he liked hip hop and R &B too. They talked about Rihanna and Drake and Nicki Minaj.  
  
"Oh!" Zayn said, his hand coming up and resting on Niall's forearm "Nicki Minaj is in this song with some other artists and they do like this version of this old R&B tune my dad used to play when I was younger. You should listen to it."  
  
Niall nodded. "I think I already heard it. On the radio. Does it go like, _'Just in case you need me, I dont mind'_?"  
"Yeah! Thats the one!" Zayn laughed. "Hey, you actually sung that really good."  
"Thanks." Niall blushed. "I actually... I sing sometimes. I dont think I'm really that good but thanks."  
"You are! You should become a singer. You said you were into indie music. Do you play guitar?"  
"Yeah, sometimes."  
"I'd like to hear you play sometime." Zayn said, rubbing his arm.  
  
Harry smiled from across the table.  
  
"They look cute together dont they?" He said.  
"Who?" Louis looked up from his phone.  
"Zayn and Niall. They've been flirting all night." Harry looked back at them. "Thats good. Niall needs a boyfriend. I havent seen him with one in like... Ever."  
"Hmph."  
"What?" Harry looked at him, eyebrow raised.  
"Nothing. Hey Zayn,"  
  
Said boy looked over, extracting his hand from Niall.  
  
"Yeah?"  
"Eleanor is throwing a party this week. We should go find out the details."  
Zayn furrowed his brow. "Really? She didnt tell me anything."  
"I just did. Lets go." Louis stood and walked away without an answer.  
Zayn stood up. "Sorry boys. Be right back."  
"Are you enjoying yourself Niall?" Harry asked, big smile on his face and he waggled his eyebrows.  
"Wh-what do you mean?"  
"You and Zayn have been flirting all night. You like him dont you?"  
"What!? No!" Niall blushed.  
"You dont have to lie to me Niall. We're best friends."  
  
_'Thats not what I want to be...'_ Niall thought.  
  
"I... I dont like him Harry."  
"Well who do you like?"  
"What?" Niall looked up from the table at him.  
"Because you've been a bit down lately. I have noticed ya know. I knew who was coming here tonight. Thats why I asked you to come. I think...I think you need a boyfriend Niall."  
"You think...what?"  
"Let me set you up. I just want you to be happy."  
  
_'I just want you to be happy.'_  
  
Thats what Niall wants to be with Harry. Thats why he set up Harry's living room that night. Thats why he was going to tell Harry his feelings. But that was when Harry told him he was seeing Louis.  
  
"Yeah well, I dont need you to set me up alright? I'm just fine on me own."  
"Whoa, babe. Calm down. I just thought-"  
"Dont fuckin call me babe! You know what Harry, how about you focus on your so-called relationship and stay the fuck out of mine!"  
"What do you mean so-called?"  
Niall huffed. "I'm leaving."  
"Niall wait! Come back! I'm sorry!"  
"Harry just..." Niall sighed. "I'll call you later okay?"  
"You're not mad at me are you?"  
"No. No I'm not mad Harry. I'm sorry too I just... I need to go. I need to think about some things."  
"Do you want me to drive you home?"  
"No. I'll be fine. Enjoy the rest of your date."  
"Okay. I'll see you later."  
  
Niall let Harry hug him.  
  
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom and then I'm gonna go."  
"Bye Niall."  
"Bye Harry."  
  
Niall passed by the waitress Eleanor and asked her where the bathroom was. She pointed to the left. Niall walked in that direction. He opened the door and as he started for one of the stalls;  
  
"Is this really what we're doing Louis? Why cant you just... Just..."  
"Just what? You're the one who broke up with me. You cant be mad when I get a new boyfriend."  
"But he's not-!" Zayn takes a deep breath. "If you really dont care then why do you always invite me out when you get these so-called boyfriends huh? Why do you always throw them in my face?"  
"I invite you out to show you that I've moved on. That I wasnt one of those pathetic people thats under the spell of Zayn Malik!"  
Zayn laughed. "Please. You know thats not true. What was that act outside then? You invite me out because you want to make me jealous."  
"Oh, dont fuckin give me that! You're the one that decided this was over! You're the one who went running to that Naughty guy! He wasnt even a real record producer! I fuckin told you he was just using you but you didnt listen!"  
"I know! I fuckin know Louis and I'm sorry! I messed up alright!? But what happened when I tried to apologize to you!? You pushed me away! You didnt want to hear it! I tried so hard Louis! I'm still trying but you know what!? I'm done! I'm sick of this shit!"  
"Oh yeah, well why dont you do something about it then!?" Louis yelled back.  
  
It sounded like someone got pushed against the stall door. It was quiet for a few seconds and then he heard;  
  
"That bloke Niall is fit. Think I might go out there and ask for his number." Zayn said.  
"You wouldnt." Louis growled.  
"Fuckin watch me."  
  
Someone got pushed against the stall door again and then it was quiet for a moment. Then Niall heard someone moan.  
  
"You like that baby?" Louis said. "You knew what you were doing out there didnt you? You wanted this to happen. Fuck, I love you."  
"Louis...dont...we should, fuck Lou, we should go home. Please."  
"Get on your knees."  
  
And then Niall left the bathroom. He's got to tell Harry. He has to. Because he's a good friend. Because he'll always support Harry. Because he loves him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this makes sense 'cuz I got distracted like so many times, lol. I've started writing a new story so I apologize for it being late or all over the place bcuz thats why I got distracted. Also please forgive the mistakes I may have made.

Niall cant believe Harry's not even tried to call him. Maybe Niall did say a few mean things a few nights ago but really, can he be blamed for that?

 

 _"Oh. Hey Ni. I thought you were leaving?" Harry said._  
 _"Harry..." Niall sat and kept his eyes on the table. "I... I need to tell you something."_  
 _"Whats wrong?" Harry's eyebrows furrowed._  
 _"You're...probably not going to believe me but I promise you, I'm telling the truth."  
_  
 _Harry reached over and put his hand on top of Niall's.  
_  
 _"Hey," He said. "Look at me. Whats wont I believe Niall?"  
_  
 _Niall took a deep breath and looked up. Harry's eyes were big like a deer caught in the headlights. His eyes were such a bright shade of green and he was absolutely beautiful. He has such an amazing personality. How can anyone even think of cheating on him? He's so wonderful.  
_  
 _"Ni? You in there?"_  
 _Niall shook his head. "Uh, what? Sorry, what?"_  
 _"You wanted to tell me something?" Harry said, pulling his hand back.  
_  
 _Niall looked down at his hand, it suddenly feeling ice cold now. He sighed and looked back at Harry.  
_  
 _"I... I uhm..." Niall closed his eyes. "I heard Louis and Zayn arguing in the bathroom."_  
 _Harry chuckled. "We argue Niall. Thats just what friends do."_  
 _"No Harry," Niall opened his eyes. "No. Listen, they were arguing about... They used to date Harry! Zayn was saying how he's sick of Louis inviting him out to meet his new boyfriends and that he still wanted to be with him! Louis told him he still loved him too and then told Zayn to get on his knees! Harry, Louis is just using you! He flaunted you around to make Zayn jealous and it worked! Hell, his fuckin dick is probably in Zayn's mouth right now!"  
_  
 _Harry just stared at him. He has no expression on his face and Niall doesnt know if Harry is still processing the information or if he even believes him.  
_  
 _"Harry," Niall said softly and quietly. "Please. Say something. You believe me dont you?"  
_  
 _Harry closed his eyes as he let out a deep sigh.  
_  
 _"I'm not lying Harry. I'd never lie to you. You know that. Please say you believe me."_  
 _"Niall-"_  
 _"I dont want to see you get hurt again Harry. You have to break up with him. Tonight."_  
 _Harry shook his head. Niall's heart clenched, tears forming in his eyes._  
 _"I'm not going to break up with him Niall."_  
 _"But he's cheating on you!" Niall yelled, palms coming down on the table. "I heard it with my own two ears! They're probably still in the bathroom right now! Go check for yourself!"_  
 _"Niall, calm down." Harry said gently._  
 _"No!" Niall stood. "I'm going to fuckin rip his throat out!"_  
 _Harry jumped up and grabbed Niall's arm. "Dont! Niall stop! Calm down!"_  
 _"Calm down!? Me!? Harry," Niall reached up and grabbed both of Harry's elbows. "How are you not mad right now?! You're boyfriend is in the toilets getting blown by his best friend! Why are you telling me to calm down!?"_  
 _"You're making a scene Niall." Harry said, looking around. "Lower your voice."_  
 _"Lower my - !"  
_  
 _Niall looked around too and sure enough, everyone was looking at them. When Niall made eye contact with the waitress Eleanor, she was blushing and she looked away quickly.  
_  
 _"She knows." Niall said._  
 _"What?" Harry tilted his head to the side._  
 _"Come here." Niall took Harry's wrist.  
_  
 _He stalked over to Eleanor who was placing empty dishes on a tray.  
_  
 _"Tell him." Niall demanded. "Tell him about Louis and Zayn."_  
 _"I... I dont know what you're talking about." She still wasnt looking at him._  
 _"Dont play that game!" Niall yelled, causing Eleanor to jump._  
 _"Niall! Stop this!" Harry yelled at him, ripping his arm away._  
 _"Harry please, just go look in the restroom!"_  
 _"I dont want to." Harry replied sheepishly, looking down._  
 _"Harry I'm trying to help you! Louis is a piece of shit and-"_  
 _"I know!" Harry screamed, this time Niall jumping. "I fuckin know alright!? I'm not stupid! I saw the way he looked at him when he came in! I saw the way they kept stealing glances! I noticed Zayn's red cheeks when Louis would speak to him directly! I know Niall!"_  
 _"You...you know?" Niall said, dumbfounded. "But Harry... Harry if you know then why... Why arent you doing anything? Why arent you furious?"_  
 _Harry shrugged. "I think we can move past this."_  
 _"You what!?"_  
 _"Louis... He told me he loved me last night and... Niall I think I love him too. We can get past this. I know we can."_  
 _"Love? You love him?"  
_  
 _Niall's heart should be breaking right now but all he can feel is anger. Towards Louis. Towards Zayn. Towards Eleanor. Towards... Harry. Harry of all people!  
_  
 _"Yeah. Yeah I do Niall."_  
 _"Harry..." Niall rubbed his temples. "Harry you two havent been dating two months yet. What do you mean you love him!?"_  
 _"Niall you probably wont understand because you've never been in love."_  
 _"What?"_  
 _"And its been so long since you've even had someone but-"_  
 _"I dont know whats its like to be in love? Harry," Niall chuckled. "I have been in love. I am in love! And I know full well that love is not...whatever the fuck you think you're feeling for Louis. Love does not treat you like shit. Love isnt watching your boyfriend flirt with his best friend friend in front of your face. Love certainly isnt staying with said boyfriend when said best friend is sucking his soul out through his penis!"_  
 _"Its complicated Niall. Love is complicated."_  
 _"No. No Harry it isnt. You know why? Because when I'm around the person I love, everything feels fantastic. Everything is better. The world seems so much easier and the colors are brighter. I dont fear anything, I can breathe easier. All bad things disappear when I see the person I love. When I'm around the person I love, my heart races a million miles a minute." Niall says, tears falling now. "Harry... Harry I-"_  
 _"Whats going on out here?"  
_  
 _They both look behind Niall and Louis and Zayn are there.  
_  
 _"Whats wrong Niall?" Zayn asks, reaching his hand out. "Why are you crying?"  
_  
 _Niall flinches back and Zayn retracts his hand. Niall looks at Harry. Niall can see Harry's eyes are watering. He's trying hard not to let them fall. Louis slides up next to Harry and puts his arms around his waist.  
_  
 _"Whats wrong baby?" Louis asks._  
 _"Niall," Harry says.  
_  
 _Niall looks back and forth at Louis and Harry. Harry steps forward, Louis taking a step with him, not letting him go.  
_  
 _"Niall talk to me. Who were you in love with?"  
_  
 _'Who_ were _you in love with?'  
_  
 _Was he even listening?  
_  
 _"-appened. Okay Niall?" Harry was saying. "I'll just grab the car and we can all-"_  
 _"No." Niall said._  
 _"No what?" Harry asked._  
 _"I cant... Harry its..."  
_  
 _Harry's eyes were wide and innocent again. Niall glanced down for a moment and then caught sight of Louis and Harry holding hands. He opened his mouth to speak but then... His legs decided they wanted to run instead. Niall dashed out of the diner._

 

Whats driving Niall mad about this whole thing is that Harry seemed to want to get to the bottom of Niall being upset a few days ago but now...he hasnt even tried to call. Hasnt even sent him a text. Could Louis have something to do with that? Did Louis tell Harry not to call him? Did Harry actually confront Louis about everything? Did Louis give him some pitiful sob story about how he loves him and only him and it was a mistake and it wont happen again? Niall growls. He bets Harry fell for it too.  
  
Niall loves Harry, he really does. But sometimes he can be gullible.   
  
Niall's watched Harry go through so many relationships. With girls. With guys. There were some in there that Niall had no problem with. They seemed great together and if Harry was happy, so was Niall. But the others werent. Some of them just used him for sex and sometimes Harry knew but he went along anyway (because Harry didnt have feelings for them. It was mean of him and he's sorry but they were both on the same page so he didnt feel all bad about it. Thats what Harry told him).   
  
There was one girl though... Niall didnt think he could despise anyone so much. The way he feels about Louis does not at all compare to how he hated that girl. Although he disliked her, she was the one who made him realize that he was in love with Harry.  
  
Niall sits back and thinks about those events. He doubts all that would happen again but he couldnt help it. He kept trying to tell him some of the things would be biologically impossible but his mind kept going.  
  
He was almost near tears when his phone rung. He dived for it an answered without checking the ID.  
  
"Harry?"  
"I knew it! See I told you Liam!"  
"Oh." Niall sighed. "Hey Jayd."  
"What happened Niall?" Jayd asked.  
"What do you mean?"  
"A friend of mine told me the other day that while she was out getting a bite to eat with her brother that there was a fight in the diner she was at. She said it was between a blonde and a really tall guy with brown hair."  
"That doesnt mean it was Niall Jayd." Liam said. It must be on speaker.  
"Liam he just answered the phone and called us Harry! We've met Harry a few times! He's really tall and has brown hair and Niall has blond. It was them!"  
  
The line was quiet for a moment.  
  
"Tell us what happened Niall." Liam said. "Are you okay?"  
Niall sighed deeply. "I caught his boyfriend cheating on him and told him but Harry said he didnt care."  
"See Liam! Thats what Em told me!"  
"Alright, stop yelling in my ear!" Liam huffed. "Jesus... Listen Niall, do you love Harry?"  
"Yes." He answered immediately.  
"Have you told him?"  
"I... I tried to. So many times but I just... Its like the world has some kind of vendetta against me or something because every time I try, he tells me he has a boyfriend or girlfriend. I dont know what to do guys. I want him to be happy but-"  
"You want him to be happy with you but if he's not then thats okay?" Jayd finished.  
"Yeah. Exactly."  
"Niall, baby listen, if Harry saw through Louis and Zayn's bullshit, dont you think he can see through yours?"  
"What-what do you- I dont understand."  
Jayd chuckled. "If he can see that they are in love with each other, dont you think he knows you're in love with him?"  
"Jayd...you're not making any sense." Niall said quietly.  
"I'm saying Niall, what if Louis isnt the one using Harry? What if Harry likes you too and is using him to get to you?"  
"No... No Harry wouldnt do that. He doesnt know that I... He doesnt know."  
"He might baby." Jayd said. "Have you ever asked him how he felt about you?"  
"What?"  
  
That thought never occurred to Niall. Niall has loved Harry for a long time. They've been friends forever. How has it never crossed his mind that Harry could feel the same too. It would make sense. When Harry didnt have a significant other, all his time would be spent with Niall. All the people he ever dated knew about Niall. He always met Harry's boyfriends and girlfriends. Harry would always introduce Niall to them. He just thought thats what best friends do. Of course Harry would want his best friend to like his girl or boy and vice versa. Harry wants everyone to like everyone. Thats just who he is. There's not-  
  
Niall gasped. "Kendall!"  
"What?" Both Liam and Jayd said.  
"Sorry. I have to go guys."  
Niall hung up and grabbed his car keys.

 

He pulled up in front of Harry's flat complex and ran up the stairs to Harry's door. He knocked but didnt get an answer so he pulled out his key.  
  
"Harry!" Niall yelled, closing the door behind him. "Harry are you here!?"  
  
Niall looked into the kitchen but he wasnt there. He then heard what sounded like something hitting the wall. Niall went down the hall and saw Harry's bedroom door closed. He didnt think before opening it.  
  
What he saw almost made the bile in his throat come out. Niall swallowed.  
  
"Oh god... Oh god... Louis!" Harry moaned as said man snapped his hips hard against Harry. "Baby! Fuck!"  
"You've got the perfect arse babe." Louis said. "I always...shit. Yeah. Squeeze me tighter. Yeah Harry. Fuck, just like that." Louis groaned. "Fuck I love you."  
"I love you - I love you too Louis. Ahh! I love you."  
Louis chuckled. "You love me?"  
"I - Ahhh! Only you. Only you Louis. I love you."  
  
Niall heart dropped. Why did he ever think that Harry could possibly love him too? Why did he let Jayd and Liam talk him into coming here? Why did he take Liam's idea for the dinner? He was an idiot for thinking something could ever happen between him and Harry. If Harry couldnt see how Niall was smitten for him for all the years they've known each other, he never would. If Harry knew Niall liked him, why would he constantly bring in people to meet Niall? Because he does know. Harry knows Niall likes him thats why he always has boyfriends and girlfriends. Thats why he's never available. He doesnt want Niall the way Niall wants him. Thats why he always introduces Niall as his best _friend_. He's been doing this all along. Making sure Niall knew that they were friends. That thats all he's ever going to be to Harry.  
  
"No." Niall said aloud.  
"What the fuck!?" Louis yelled, he pulled out of Harry and rolled over onto the other side of the bed, grabbing covers and throwing them over his dick. "What the fuck is he doing here!? How the hell did you get in here!?"  
"Niall?" Harry called to him. "Niall whats going on?"  
"Whats going on!? Tell him to get out! What the fuck is - What the fuck!?" Louis yelled again. "Were you standing there the whole time watching us!? What kind of freak best friend do you have Harry!?"  
  
Harry said nothing. He just stared at Niall and Niall stared back. Is he really not going to defend him? Niall scoffed. Of course. Why would he? He doesnt care about him.  
  
"I'm going home." Niall said.  
"What?"  
  
If Niall wants to get over Harry, he's going to have to leave. There's no other way. Everything here just reminds of everything Harry. Of everything that could have been. Of everything that was. He cant do it anymore.  
  
"Niall... Niall what are you doing here?" Harry asks, holding the covers up to his bare chest.  
"Yeah mate, shut the door would ya?" Louis adds.  
  
Niall flicks his wet eyes back to Harry.  
  
"I just came by to...t let you know I'm going back to Mullingar."  
"What?" Harry stands then, naked to the world. "Why?"  
"Harry I... I cant keep this in anymore and the only way to get rid of it is by leaving."  
"Niall I dont understand. Whats going on? What can I do to help?"  
"Nothing. Not anymore."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harry gets a little confusing towards the end (I mean, he is in real life too so...) but I hope you guys will get what he's trying to say.

"Are you sure you want to do this Niall?" Jayd asks over the phone. "Please think about this."  
"I have Jayd and I'm done. I've stood by him for five years and I cant do it anymore. I cant keep getting my heart stomped on."  
"But how can you say that Ni? You haven't even told him how you feel about him! How is he supposed to know that he's hurting you!?"  
"I tried!" Niall yelled. "I tried so many times! Its not my fault he always decides to get a girlfriend or boyfriend just when I get the courage! It always happens Jayd! Always! I think he does it on purpose..." Niall's voice softens at the end.  
"What do you mean by that honey?"  
"Nothing. Just...forget it."  
"Talk to me Ni. Why do you think that?"  
"I dont want to. Not right now okay? Please."  
Jayd sighs. "Okay. Sorry."  
The phone was silent for a while.  
"Oh hey Ni."  
"Yeah?"  
"Who is Kendall?"  
Niall stiffens and then he lets out a deep breath.  
"Kendall is... Kendall was one of Harry's ex-girlfriends."  
"Why did you call out her name when we told you to go talk to Harry?"  
Niall shakes his head. "She knew."  
The phone was quiet for a moment.  
"She knew what?" Jayd asked.  
"She knew that I was in love with Harry."  
"How?"  
"I'm not sure. But... I dont know. Whenever I was around them she'd cling to Harry like...like herpes on a hooker."  
Jayd laughed. "Oh my god. I cant believe you said that."  
"Yeah well... Anyway, she never let him be alone with me. If I called Harry to hang out at my apartment instead of his, she'd still come with him." Niall sighed. "One day she told me that she knew that I had feelings for Harry and to stay away from him. She called me all the gay names in the book and then told me to leave."  
"Oh Niall. Why didn't you tell me any of this? I totally would have kicked her ass for you."  
This time Niall laughed.  
"Its okay. I gave her a piece of my mind after. Maybe like a week after they broke up so yeah."  
"I would have loved to see that."  
"Thanks. Anyway, I should finish packing."  
"Niall...are you really gonna go through with this?"  
"I am."  
Jayd sighed heavily. "I guess I cant stop you. I'll miss you Niall."  
"I'll miss you too. Tell Liam I love him."  
"He's right here actually. Hang on, I'll wake him up."  
"Its like seven in the evening. Why is he asleep? Shouldn't he be at work?"  
"He took the day off today and we had sex an hour ago."  
"Shit, you two are never _not_ in each other are you?"  
"Thats all Liam. All the time with him I swear. I cant catch a break."  
"But you're not complaining." Niall finished.  
"Nope." Jayd said, popping the p then laughing. "Liam. Liam wake up."  
"Go away." Niall heard him mumble.  
"Niall's leaving Liam."  
"Is he here?" Liam asked groggily.  
"No. He's going back to Ireland."  
Niall heard a bit of shuffling then,  
"You're doing what!?" Liam yelled. "Why Niall? What happened?"  
"Liam-" Niall started.  
"Is this about Harry? Tell me where he lives right now. I'll kick both his and Louis' asses."  
"Its...its not really... I'm fine Liam, I promise. This will be good for me. I'll finally get to spend more time with me family and reconnect with my old friends back there. Its okay."  
"Niall its not fuckin okay! Jayd why are you letting him do this!? Are you still at home? I'm coming over and-"  
"No!" Niall yells. "Sorry Liam but...this is my life. I just... I just want to let my heart heal and if I stay here... I'm going alright? I wont stay there forever. I'll be back as soon as I can."  
"Niall please-"  
"I love you. I love both of you and I'll miss you two so much."  
"Love you too Ni."  
"I'll call you when I land."  
"Okay. Bye Niall."  
"Bye."

* * * * * *

"Where the fuck are you going?" Louis asked Harry as Harry tugged on his shoes.  
"I have to stop him. Something's wrong. I cant just let him leave."  
"He's a grown man. If he wants to go back to Ireland, let him."  
"No Louis. He's been... I dont know whats been going on lately with him. He wont tell me. It must be something big if he's leaving the country."  
"Harry-"  
"I knew there was something going on when decorated my flat and cooked me dinner. He was fidgeting that entire night."  
"Whoa whoa. What do you mean he decorated your flat and cooked for you?"  
Harry looked back at Louis as if he forgot he was there.  
"Nothing." Harry shakes his head. "Its nothing."  
Louis throws the covers off him. "It doesn't sound like nothing. Why were you smiling like that?"  
"What?" Harry furrows his brows.  
"After you said all that you got this weird look on your face. You smiled like... Thats the same way that Z-... Harry you smiled like you were in love or something."  
Harry scoffed then mumbled, "You would know wouldn't you?"  
"What was that?" Louis asked.  
"Nothing."  
"You said something. Dont go talking shit if you cant-"  
"I said I know what you and Zayn did back at the restaurant!"  
Louis said nothing for a moment and then crossed his arms.  
"What the fuck are you talking about?"  
"You and Zayn fucked in the toilets! Dont try and deny it because Niall saw you!"  
Louis lifted a brow. "Oh." He dropped his arms. "I see whats going on here."  
"What?" Harry was confused now.  
He just confronted Louis and Louis acted as if he said nothing.  
"That weird Irish kid likes you."  
"What?" Harry blinks a few times. "What?"  
"It all makes sense now."  
"What are you talking about Louis?"  
"Yeah. The first time you introduced us, he was shooting daggers at me the entire day. Then at the restaurant he wouldn't stop staring at you and when I would kiss you he looked like he wanted to kill me. I heard yelling when I was in the bathroom but all I could make out was my name. He told you to break up with me didn't he?"  
"Uhm..."  
Louis laughed. "Oh my god. Harry, are you really this _blind_?"  
"Louis I..." Harry shakes his head. "Niall is going through something right now. He's just uhm... He-"  
"Yeah. He's going through a thing called heartbreak."  
  
Harry sat on the bed. Its not true. Is it? Niall doesn't really like him does he? Harry tried to rack his brain for signs, answers, but comes up with nothing. Niall doesn't like him like Louis is implying or Harry is really oblivious. Harry knows he can be that sometimes. There's no way he would be to something like that though. He would have known. Niall doesn't keep secrets. At least between him and Harry. He always tells Harry what he's thinking or feeling. He would have told Harry how he felt. Right? Then again... Harry was never single long enough for Niall to have an opportunity. Except with Xander. He didn't date anyone for months after Xander. Harry gasps. The dinner!  
  
"Louis, are you sure about this? Niall likes me?"  
"He doesn't just like you mate, he's in **love** with you."  
"He's...in love..." Harry stands. "I have to go find him. I need to... Wait. Louis, why arent you mad about this? You sound like you dont even care."  
Louis shrugs. "We both knew what this was."  
Harry says nothing.  
"Go find your Irish friend Harry."  
Harry nods and runs out of his flat.

* * * * * *

Harry goes straight to Niall's flat but he's not home. At least thats what he concludes because he knocked on the door for at least five minutes and no one answered. All the lights are off too. He tries to call him next, he doesn't hear a phone ringing inside nor does Niall pick up. Harry wonders what to do next. Wait. Niall's friend Liam lives two blocks over. He could be there and if not, Liam would know where Niall is.  
  
He called the airport already and there are no flights to Ireland tonight. Niall has to be there. He really hopes he is.  
  
Harry knows that Liam lives in apartments but he cant remember which one was his number. He walks through the complex for a few minutes looking at all the doors. Which one was his?  
  
He sees a man, a young one. Looks about the same age as himself and Niall. Maybe he knows Liam.  
  
"Excuse me," Harry calls. "Hi. I was wondering if you know Liam? He's about this tall and he's got brown hair always styled into a little quiff. He's quite muscular and he's got these like...chevrons tattooed on his arm?"  
The guy nods. "Yeah. You're in the wrong block actually. He lives in building C. You're in building A."  
"Oh thank god. How do I get to building C?"  
"You see that little park there? Just go through it and in front of that row of apartments is building C. Liam lives in the fourth row. Number 526 C."  
"Thank you."  
  
Harry follows the mans directions and soon finds Liam's apartment. He takes the steps two at a time. He bangs on the door harshly.  
  
"Coming, I'm coming!" He hears.  
The door opens and Liam is standing in front of Harry.  
"Excuse me but why are you pounding on my door so hard? You could've just - Harry?"  
"Is Niall here?" Harry asks.  
Liam crosses his arms. "You've got some fuckin nerve showing your face here. Do you have any idea what you've put Niall through? He's been crying for _**ages**_ Harry! You think you can just-"  
"I know I know!" Harry cut him off. "Where is he? Please I need to talk to him."  
"You have no fuckin right!" Liam shoves at Harry's shoulders. "I dont want you going anywhere near him!"  
"I know how he feels and I want to tell him that I-"  
"You _know_ how he feels?! You knew how he felt this whole time and yet you still strung him along?!" Liam grabs his shirt. "I will fuckin-"  
"Liam what the hell!?" Jayd yells. She grabs Liam's arm and tugs him away from Harry. "What are you doing!?"  
"He knows Jayd! He just told me he knows that Niall is in love with him!"  
Jayd turns to Harry. "Is that true?"  
"I mean well... It took me a while to find out but... Please. Do you know where he is? He's not answering my calls."  
Jayd stares at him for a moment.  
"Please."  
She sighs. "He's at the place you first met."  
"Jayd!" Liam yells. "Whose side are you on!?"  
"Shut up Liam." She turns back to Harry. "You'd better not hurt him."  
"I wont, I promise."  
"I surely hope so. Otherwise I'll unleash the beast." She gestures with her head at Liam.  
Harry nods quickly. "Thank you."

* * * * * *

 _'At the place you first met.'_  
They met at a Tesco's. It was around Halloween and some kids pulled a prank on Harry and silly strung him. Niall found him in the parking lot trying to pull strings from his hair. Niall laughed at him at first but then took him to the restroom in Tesco's and helped him get it all out.  
  
After that, Niall and Harry went shopping from the lists their mums had given them. Harry asked Niall if he needed a ride and as they were loading Harry's mum's car, those same kids came back and silly stringed them both. Niall called them a _'shower of cunts'_. Harry gasped and told him to stop cursing. They looked at each other and then burst out laughing. They'd been inseparable ever since.  
  
But would Niall really be in Tesco's at this hour just wandering around? Wouldnt the workers think it was a little strange of him to walk around not buying anything?  
  
Harry was already parked in the parking lot. Should he go in and see if Niall is inside? Harry got out of the car. Niall cant be in there. If he had been, its possible he could have been asked to leave. Harry started towards the doors. He glanced back at his car but then stopped. The park across the street. There was a lone figure standing at the rails looking out at the river. It was too dark and far away to tell who it was but Harry was pulled in that direction anyway.  
  
As he got closer and closer, he could see blond hair. The height, the posture, his broad shoulders.  
  
"Niall."  
The figure turned around.  
"Harry?"  
Harry ran over and pulled him into a hug.  
"Niall what the hell?! I've been looking for you everywhere!"  
"Why?"  
Harry let go. "What do you mean why? You come into my house and tell me you're leaving for Mullingar and then you ran out. Why wouldn't I come look for you?"  
Niall looked away. "Seemed like you were a bit busy."  
"Niall..." Harry paused. "Niall, I'm going to ask you something and I want you to be completely honest with me okay?"  
Niall doesn't look at him but nods.  
"How long?"  
  
Niall looks up then. Harry can see on his face that Niall knows exactly what he's referring to.  
  
Niall takes a deep breath and then turns back to the river.  
  
"Since we were 18."  
"How come you never told me?"  
"At first I was just nervous but the longer I said nothing... The more it seemed like you would never be interested in me. You had so many boyfriends and girlfriends and when you didn't, you were just fuckin somebody. I dont know Harry. Every time I talked myself up to telling you, I'd get scared. I kept thinking that you'd tell me that you liked me but...just as a friend."  
"What was different this time?" Harry asked, now standing beside Niall so he could see his face. "Why didn't you get scared this time?"  
"Because I was tired Harry. I'd been keeping it in for five years. And..."  
"And what?"  
"It...it was something you said. You were drunk so I dont think you remember but it helped me decide. I had to tell you before you might have changed your mind."  
"What did I say?"  
It was dark but Harry could see Niall's cheeks turn red. He knows its not from the cold.  
"Its not something... Its not something that I should have been happy about I think but... I was. To me, it made my heart beat faster and the butterflies in my stomach go crazier than normal."  
"What was it Niall?"  
"You... You told me that... You told me that you've wanked to the thought of me before. More than once. You told me that you'd never gotten off so good to anyone else before. You said it wasn't because I was really sexy but because... Because I was special to you. That you cared about me a lot and..." Niall chuckled. "And that you were gonna get off on me again that night."  
  
Harry blushed. He doesn't remember telling Niall that no but he cant believe he told him that. Harry has gotten off to Niall before. It was intense. Better than if he'd wank to anyone else. He never knew why. Harry takes a deep breath.  
  
"Niall..." He puts his hand on top of Niall's. "I've always had different levels of feelings for all the people I've ever dated. I never classified them as love though. I know that I've told people that but it was because I thought that maybe one day the feeling I had would grow into that. It never did. But you..."  
  
Niall looked at him, eyes wide. Harry could see Niall was scared but anxious to hear the next words, whether they hurt him or not.  
  
"My feelings for you... They only grew more and more. I just thought it was like... I dont know. Personality changes I guess? When we get older we change ya know so I just thought that my feelings for you changed because thats just what happens. I always wanted you by my side. I always wanted to know if you were doing okay. How your day had been and all of that stuff. Because we're friends. Best friends. And thats just how you feel about your best friend. I wont lie to you Niall, I've thought about it. About us being together but..."  
"But?"  
"I'd compare the way I felt about you to everyone I'd ever dated and it wasnt the same. Like I said, I had different levels of feelings but they all...they all ended up the same way ya know. You were the only exception. It felt different with you, my feelings. It wasnt the same as I felt with everyone else so I thought that... I didnt think what I felt for you... I dont know what I thought."  
"No." Niall turned to Harry and put a hand on his cheek. "No, I get it Harry. I get you. I always have. When no one else did. I always will."  
"I'm sorry Niall." Harry took his hand off his cheek to hold it. "I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it. I'm sorry that I broke your heart so many times. I'm sorry that I was so stupid and oblivious."  
"Its okay."  
"But why Niall? Why is it okay? I hurt you so much and I didnt even care."  
Niall smirked. "Take a guess."  
"Because you're a saint?"  
Niall laughed. "No."  
"Because you're a good friend?"  
"No."  
"Because you support me even if I'm being dumb?"  
"No."  
"Why?"  
  
Niall leaned up on his toes and pressed his lips against Harry's. Both their lips were dry from the cold air but they became wet as they licked in and around each other's mouths. Niall pulled back and put his forehead on Harry's.  
  
"Because I love you."

**Author's Note:**

> I do so hope you enjoyed it! :-)


End file.
